The Name Game

I'm pretty sure I mentioned this in an earlier post, but one of the best parts of my job (and I'm sure Corey will agree) is that if we ever get a new English student without an English name, we get to name them.

In training, we were regaled of stories of the naming schemes people came up with for their students. There were "Superman"s and "Batman"s, some "Bender"s and "Fry"s, and the occasional Apu.

Now, of course this is hilarious, but if you think about it... it's sort of cruel. Even by my standards. So I decided to skip the super hero names (for this semester at least...) and went with a TV show very close to my heart.

My first nameless kid was to be bestowed with the manliest of manly American names: Jack. In one of the clearest examples of our cultural divide, he refused. I know, I don't get it. He was named Tony instead.



The next kid I got to name accepted the honor of being called Jack right off the bat. Clearly he understood the power and meaning behind it. Either that, or he was just really confused why the Foreign Teacher was talking to him so loudly.



So I had my Jack and Tony. I was sort of peeved I didn't get to name anyone else, but this weekend, the floodgates opened with an odd influx of new students. I was overwhelmed.

When I got to name another one yesterday, I knew Jack and Tony would need an adversary should they ever meet.

Enter Victor.



Proud of myself, I didn't think I'd need to name anyone else so I was caught off guard in my next class. But I figured, the kid seemed level headed and good in a pinch (of course I gathered all of this in 20 seconds). Welcome to Future English School Bill.



Soon after though, I realized I missed a great potential for a name. I got lucky when I had a new student this morning. I named him in honor of one our countries most beloved, and heroic, fallen icons.

We miss you Edgar, but now you'll live on.



So those are the kids I've named so far. I'm hoping for more, and planning a new system for next semester. Maybe there'll be Spider-Man butchering my language right in front of me.

But until then, I do need to contend with this guy:



I didn't name him, and he isn't suave at all. But he sure does have a license to piss off me and my Chinese Teacher.

Yeah. I got a kid named James Bond.

peace,
Shawn