Stuff

Getting stuff in China has proven to be quite interesting indeed. Some stuff is easy to come by, and other stuff... not so easy.

Interestingly (maybe), DaLian has two Wal-Marts, so getting western-ish goods isn't THAT big of a problem. Although there seems to be no cheese anywhere. The thing is, for the good stuff, you don't go to Wal-Mart.

Oh no. Oh no no no no.

DVDs
China, much like the appropriately named China-Town of cities such as New York, has a vibrant and booming bootleg DVD trade. And here is how it works: You walk into a store that has CDs and a few assorted legal DVDs. You peruse for a few seconds, and then an employee comes up to you. In barely audible English (or I guess still Chinese...) they ask "DVD?" You nod. And then they show you a small stack. You shake your head and gesture "More... ummm... bigger selection... ummm... more!" This is followed by some more nodding, and some whispered Chinese between employees.

The next thing you know, you're running after the employee who is taking you down some winding route into a strange locker in a basement that is filled to the brim with bootlegs. At this point, you peruse to your hearts content. Be sure to pay attention to what is written on the back. Sometimes they are actually descriptions of the movie inside. Sometimes they don't have that many copy errors. But most of the time they do, and most of the time they're about a different movie. But worry not. Just because your copy of Casino Royale has the rating info for Corpse Bride, it'll be Casino Royale. The Chinese are good with pictures. Maybe not so much with words.

The best though was the bootlegged "Man of the Year" which had a negative review for the film printed on the back.

Close enough.

So then you grab your stack. The employee will take them, and rush you back upstairs to the store. Then comes the bargaining. They'll type out the price on a calculator. No matter what it is, fake incredulity. Nuh uh sistah... you gotta do better. So type your preferred price. Keep at it for a while, and see how low they'll go.

It's like limbo, but MORE illegal.

Oh, and when you get home... don't expect all of them to work, so buy a few. They're cheap. And if you're really good on the calculator - they're REALLY cheap. (I didn't bargain nearly enough the first time. I'll show them next time!)

Of course this isn't the only way to get your bootlegs. Sometimes you can just be on the street. Most of the basics'll still apply, but be prepared to follow winding routes into strange apartments. Oh yeah, and if they start making obscene hand gestures when they say DVD... just make sure you know what kinda DVDs you're in for.

Apparently they'll bootleg anything.


CELL PHONES
Just like America, China has tons of cell phone stores, stands and kiosks. But apparently, you only use them if you're a complete fucking loser.

Kidding.

Sort of.

The way Corey and I were told (and subsequently taken) to buy a cell phone, is to go to the guy on the street. You know... the guy.

You go into his little shack on the side street, and with someone who speaks Chinese, you get them to show you there selection of phones. Keep in mind, said selection may be presented to you out of a duffel bag. And they may get more brought to them in a plastic bag while you're negotiating.

Yeah, that's what happened. But what can I say? The phone works. Not so much in the apartment... but that's probably the apartment's fault.

Oh yeah, and you get to choose and buy your cell phone number. They're priced according to the amount of unlucky numbers in them. Really.

So of course us idiot Westerners are looking for numbers with as many 4's in them as possible. They practically give them away. All you need to do is be willing to tempt fate every time you use your phone or something.

I don't get it, but hey, I'll go with it.


TOYS
Just a quick note here, as I haven't really bought any toys here. But in many of the stores, I was sort of surprised by what I saw. Sort of.

You know the Chinese stores you have down the block from wherever it is you live? You know all the shitty knockoff toys they sell?

Yeah. That's what they have here. Everywhere. Even in the aforementioned Wal-Marts.


So I guess the take away message of this post is that no matter how different China is from home... when it comes to STUFF, China ain't that different from say... Canal Street.

- S